Caption the Cat, Technicolor Edition

I have combined my favorite new feature, Caption the Cat, with Scalzi's Monday Photo Shoot this week: Turn something an unexpected color. Most photo editing software will let you fiddle with the hue of your photos: Use that feature to make your photo subject a color it would be impossible (or at least, very unlikely) for it to be in real life.

And so I present Milo in Blue:

I know you want to make a great caption for this picture. Personally, I'm even more smitten with him knowing that he looks just as good blue as his natural orange. It just proves that he's the prettiest cat ever.

Never Judge a Donut by its Frosting

*sigh*

Scott and I were doing SO well for SO long with not buying junk food when we went to the store. Then Triscuits were B.O.G.O., and how can you have Triscuits without canned cheese? Then we wanted to try this caramelized pineapple recipe we saw on Take Home Chef. And we needed ice cream for that.

It has snowballed. We could feed a troupe of teenage boys from our pantry.

And did I mention we bought donuts? When I was little, I thought the best ones in the whole world were the Entenmann's chocolate covered donuts. The delicious not-too-dry white cakey goodness surrounded by an almost-hard layer of dark chocolate... Does life get any better than that?

Well I grabbed a box and threw it on top of the junk food heap in the cart. What can I say? I guess I was just overcome by sweet memories. Imagine my surprise when I grabbed one out of the box (roughly 15 minutes after we got home), took a bite, and saw CHOCOLATE cake under the chocolate frosting. What happened to the white cake? Do they sell both now? Oh well, I guess this teaches us all an important lesson about impulse junk food buying:

Read The Label!

Kiss My Muscles

Last night, my manager and I, assisted by my trainee, put together a new wine rack for our cooler. There's four of these racks total, and I watched the other manager put together the first one, so I knew it wasn't hard.

The putting together involved a whole lot of me banging things into place (seriously, the instructions say to twist the connector into the pole and then bang it on the ground to wedge it in!) while the guys either handed me things or just watched.

Of course, the manager has a really bad back. I can't blame him for not jumping in and doing the heavy work. And the New Guy tries to help, but he's pretty special and just can't seem to get things right. For example, the individual racks look like this (I tried to add a picture, but it just didn't want to happen). Actually, that's exactly what they are. Every time NG picked up a rack to attach it to the base, he'd try to put it on upside down. "No, NG, the other way." And then he'd rotate it 180 degrees, but still upside down. "No, NG, you still have it upside down." This happened with multiple shelves. Maybe he's never seen a wine rack before? Really, the concept is much like an egg crate - you put the bottle in the curve. But his way would only be acceptable for use in zero gravity!

We did manage to get one of the racks completely finished last night. There's still two more in the hallway. I'm sure the boss left instructions whether he wants us to finish, or wants us to wait for him. I wonder if this is something I could do completely without help? Well, at any rate, I'm wearing comfy pants today.

My Favorite Freedom

Weekend Assignment #133: Share with us a person or person who you think is a model for free speech in the United States. It can be one of the Founding Fathers, another historical personage, or someone who is living right now.

Well, this is certainly more heady than the "cats or dogs?" Weekend Assignment, isn't it? How delicious!

Well, as a communications major at Penn State, my favorite course without questions was my first Comm Law class. Why? It dealt almost exclusively with the first amendment. I really sank my teeth into that class, and felt like I was ready to go and become a lawyer myself. Obviously that didn't happen. But I still love the first amendment, and I love to argue it with people (especially my second amendment husband).

However, for this assignment, I chose to share someone who USED the first amendment to fight for other amendments: Susan B. Anthony. This woman dedicated much of her life to speaking out publicly against the status quo. She fought for equal wages for female teachers, she fought for the rights of former slaves, and of course, for female suffrage. She started a weekly journal, The Revolution, which "was to promote women's and African Americans’ right to suffrage, but it also discussed issues of equal pay for equal work, more liberal divorce laws, and the church’s position on women's issues."

She's the kind of person I wish we had more of today.

She was also arrested for voting in the 1872 Presidential election, and gave her most famous speech during her 1873 trial. Here's an excerpt:

The preamble of the Federal Constitution says: "We, the people of the United States, in order to form a more perfect union, establish justice, insure domestic tranquillity, provide for the common defense, promote the general welfare, and secure the blessings of liberty to ourselves and our posterity, do ordain and establish this Constitution for the United States of America."

It was we, the people; not we, the white male citizens; nor yet we, the male citizens; but we, the whole people, who formed the Union. And we formed it, not to give the blessings of liberty, but to secure them; not to the half of ourselves and the half of our posterity, but to the whole people - women as well as men. And it is a downright mockery to talk to women of their enjoyment of the blessings of liberty while they are denied the use of the only means of securing them provided by this democratic-republican government - the ballot.

However, her defense was all for naught. The judge, Supreme Court Associate Justice Ward Hunt, explicitly instructed the jury to deliver a guilty verdict, refused to poll the jury, delivered an opinion he had written before trial had even begun, and on June 18, 1873, sentenced her to pay a $100 fine. Anthony responded, "May it please your honor, I will never pay a dollar of your unjust penalty." She never did pay the fine, and the government never pursued her for nonpayment. (this last paragraph copied directly from Wikipedia)

So that's the story of Susan B. Anthony. I know I learned a lot about her this morning.

Extra Credit: A favorite controversial book (it doesn't have to be from an American). Gee... a controversial book? I have read a lot of banned books, but none that I think were truly controversial. Instead, I would like to offer my favorite first amendment quote, from the movie The American President:

America isn't easy. America is advanced citizenship. You gotta want it bad, 'cause it's gonna put up a fight. It's gonna say "You want free speech? Let's see you acknowledge a man whose words make your blood boil, who's standing center stage and advocating at the top of his lungs that which you would spend a lifetime opposing at the top of yours. You want to claim this land as the land of the free? Then the symbol of your country can't just be a flag; the symbol also has to be one of its citizens exercising his right to burn that flag in protest. Show me that, defend that, celebrate that in your classrooms. Then, you can stand up and sing about the "land of the free".

I Just...

saved a bunch of money on my car insurance
by switching to Geico!

Seriously... I did. Around $150 less for a six-month policy. It would have been more, but I cut my deductible in half and added uninsured motorist coverage (which, in Florida, is probably the most important kind and somehow I was living without it).

Why didn't anyone tell me that Progressive was screwing me all this time?

Anyway, I'd like to think it wasn't the gekko... or the cavemen... or the "celebrities" like Charro and Vern Troyer that got me to change. Really, how many ad campaigns does one company need to run simultaneously? But I am completely susceptible to TV commercials.

There's some sort of pre-insurance inspection (free) that I have to do between now and the first week of November. Looks like I'm going on a road trip this weekend, since the closest places are down 50 in Winter Garden and up by the Florida Mall.

Fall Foliage...Florida Style

Scalzi's Monday Photo Shoot for this week seems simple enough: Leaves are changing color all over the US -- show us the foliage in your neck of the woods... Get out there in the crisp autumn air and get a good shot at the trees near you.

Well, I hate to disappoint, so I got out there in the crisp (brr... 81 degree) Florida Autumn air and took a picture from the landing between the second and third floors of my building. Sadly, it seems that the trees are all still green. Don't be fooled by the yellow-ish one in the middle -- that was just sunset hitting it funny!

Luckily, I anticipated that this might be a problem, so I took the camera to Publix with me, figuring I'd find a tacky display of pumpkins with some fake leaves. But I found something even better:

Do you see the pretty Autumn leaves? Of course you do! But here's a close-up anyway:


This time of year is when I miss living up north most. I don't really miss snow. But I loved the changing seasons. Here, the change of seasons between 9 months of Summer and 3 months of Indian Summer is still another month or so away.

I guess we Floridians will just have to make do with beaches and palm trees and pictures of everyone else's orange and red leaves. Oh well!

Look Over There ---->

I finally updated my blogroll. Most of the blogs I've added are humor. Grey Matter is actually the writers' blog for Grey's Anatomy. And Whatever is John Scalzi's personal blog. It's much darker than his for-money AOL blog By The Way... (which has been a staple on my blogroll for over a year).

Anyway, when you get bored with me, check out some of the bloggers who get me through the day.

God Bless Jean Paul Gaultier

Gaultier uses 'size 20' model

JEAN-PAUL Gaultier caused a storm in Paris last night by sending a plus-size model down the catwalk.

As controversy raged on about the use of size 0 models, the French designer made his own statement about beauty.

The woman - a New Yorker named Velvet - shocked the skinny front row fashionistas in a daring black basque, stockings and suspenders.

Yep... she wore a black teddy and black thigh-highs. A picture accompanies the article, if you're curious. Hey man - I've always thought that fashion runway shows were completely off the deep end. Sure, JPG put a chunky chick in a teddy and sent her out for millions of people to see, but they teased her hair up a foot over her head and gave her crazy makeup just like all of the other runway models. Why can't they just make them look normal?

Maybe that will be next year's fashion revolution: send the girls down the runway in ponytails and human make up. Shocking!

Three Months

Last night, I switched my blog over to the new Blogger Beta. Why? Well, for one, I was very excited about putting tags on all of my posts. I've gone back 100 posts, and have a little more than 150 to go (wow...my "food" posts have gone up exponentially since I started this job!). In the process of going through my old entries, I found a ticker that once was counting down my days left at the Call Center. Now the ticker is still there, counting UP my days away. And today was the three-month anniversary of my last day there. So I sent an e-mail out to some of my old chums...

My last day at the Call Center was 3 months ago today.

Has the hole in your hearts healed yet? Don't worry… it takes time to get over heartbreak!

Tee hee. I hope you are all having a lovely day, and that the crazies leave you the heck alone.

I know, it's amazing these people still talk to me! Well I got a few responses, and Jim's was so funny I just had to share it:

My heart is still mending but I think I'll get over it soon.. So ahhhhhh anymore free food lately? It's all about the food, you know. See the other day we were all handed a "Kudos" bar with a stupid little tag line "Kudos to you for all you do" and I was looking at it thinking how great it would be to be you with your $40 a lb lobster tail. I think a tear actually came to my eye! And the funny part is I dont eat seafood and I probably would of ate that piece of lobster meat just because of the price! Anyway of course we all miss you! You'll have to come visit again sometime!

Yeah, I definitely made a good career move. But I really miss those guys.

Bite Me

...on second thought, please don't!

I have five giant mosquito bites. On my butt. I was outside for less than 10 minutes, and will probably be scratching for a week. Why was I outside? Well, that was supposed to be the subject of this blog before the bites consumed my conscious thought. Let's start again, shall we?

Don't Say I Never Give You Anything

I got some table scraps tonight. Well, I got a plate of food that for some reason wasn't going out into the restaurant. (God Bless my favorite Sous Chef!!) And I, good wife that I am, remembered that I had promised Mr. ParkHopper half of the next thing they fed me. So I called him and asked if he wanted me to save him half of a tempura crab stuffed squash blossom with violette moustarde. Of course, he said yes.

Not only did he say yes, but he said he'd come over and get it. This was probably a better idea than mine - stick it in the fridge until he got home from work. Since my shift ended 15 minutes later, we decided to just meet up by my parking lot.

...and then he got involved in actual work and was 10 minutes later than I was (this would be the point that my @$$ turned into the All You Can Eat Flesh Buffet). When he arrived, he performed some sort of weird culinary ritual with his three-bite-size morsel:

He smelled it in the little plastic container I had put it in. Then he picked it up and studied it. Then he smelled it in his hand. Then he took a bite and closed his eyes while he chewed. I've never seen him chew more slowly! When I tried to ask him how it was, he shushed me. He actually shushed me! Pah! And when it was all over, he actually lip-smacked. I can't recall the last time I saw him savor food more.

I guess that makes it official - he should have my job. Actually, he couldn't handle my job. It involves being nice to people. He doesn't do nice. But he would certainly enjoy the little perks of my job even more than I do.

As for the squash blossom, it was good. I really think I'm just not a huge fan of shellfish. To me, crab (minced, as in crab cakes) looks and tastes a lot like canned tuna. Don't get me wrong, I like tuna. But it's more of a lunchtime staple than a culinary delight. I guess this once again proves that I'm just not a food snob.

A Plague of Cell Phones Upon Your House

Scalzi's weekend assignment points to a recent viral video. A (supposed) professor walks up to a student who answers his cell phone in class and punishes the student for his behavior. Was that professor justified in doing what he did? Have people completely lost all sense of courtesy when it comes to their cell phones? This is a pure opinion piece, folks -- tell me what you think.

I'll have to suspend my disbelief here, because I think this video was a set-up. If someone were really taping a lecture, they would've stayed on the professor instead of zooming in on the back of the head of Mr. Chatty Pants. But let's assume the incident really occurred. I don't think the prof was justified in destroying someone else's property. Seems a little like inappropriate "road rage" behavior to me. He would, however, have been completely within his rights to remove the phone from the kid's hand and pocket it. Then the kid would have had to beg for mercy after class.

As for people and cell phones in general, YES! My poor husband has been in one too many restaurants (ok, Chinese buffets) with me when I absolutely fume at the rudeness of the 10 construction guys using their Nextel walkie-talkie feature loudly enough that I can hear the conversation. And that **beep beep** sound drives me up a freakin' wall. First, I'm not a Nextel hater - I own a Nextel. I also know that you don't have to use the direct connect function on speaker - you can hold the phone up to your ear and pretend you're on a regular phone call.

I don't think I'm being unreasonable here, but I propose
10 Commandments for Wireless Users:

1) Thou shalt keep thy phone on vibrate when you are in public. (yes, the Mexican Hat Dance ringtone was funny in 1998 - now it's just annoying)
2) Thou shalt not answer thy phone in a movie theater
3) Thou shalt not OPEN thy phone in a movie theater (those LCD screens are bright!)
4) Thou shalt excuse thyself from the table and leave the dining area of a restaurant to answer thy phone
5) Thou shalt SHUT UP AND DRIVE
6) Thou shalt not text while driving
7) Thou shalt not use speaker phone in public
8) Thou shalt not use juvenile ringtones. (Cats meowing, dogs barking, police sirens, any sort of alarm, or -gawdhelpme- the sounds of bodily functions.)*
9) Thou shalt always think of others' needs before engaging in a telephone conversation which others might find disturbing or annoying. Always.**
10) Thou shalt not text while walking in a crowd.***
(I asked for some help with my 10 Commandments - and you delivered:
* from Janette
**from Wil
***from Laura)

Extra credit: Do you sometimes answer your cell phone at inappropriate times?
Rarely. I answered at work once or twice when I really had to talk to the person calling, but I went to the breakroom to talk. And I talk when I'm driving. Scott, on the other hand, is so attached to his phone that he may some day need to have it surgically removed. Case in point: he answered his phone mid-way through our first date and talked to a female friend of his for at least five minutes. I have since forgiven him, but I haven't let him live it down.

Caption the Cat

Anyone in the mood to play a round of "Caption This?" (umm... did I steal that title from you Janette? you're not using it anymore, right? oh well, moving on...) I'm going to put my caption in the comment thread.


NOTE: no cats were harmed in the taking of this photo. In fact, Kilo has not been crushed by a chair. He's alive and fat, just like before this picture was taken. I just have two weird cats who like to sleep in weird places!

Parkhopper's Follies, or When Cat Food is Funny

Last night after we left MGM, we stopped at Target. Lunch with some of "the gang" was on the agenda for this afternoon, and we wanted to give Chris and Cathi their wedding present when we were all together. Of course, gift giving is much easier after you've bought the gift!

So we bought the gift, came home, and I decided to watch TV instead of wrapping. I had to do it this morning when I woke up. I managed to get it all wrapped, but didn't have time to curl the ribbon before we left the house (I may have had time, but the darn cats think that ribbon is a toy). So I grabbed the scissors and we headed out and I curled the ribbon in the car. Looking back, I should have just left the ribbon slightly curled like it is in the picture. The final result was a little more jerri-curlesque than I would have preferred!

After our trip to Sand Lake to get Scott's bloodwork taken, we drove to Downtown Disney and went toy shopping before lunch. So we threw the gift and the scissors in the trunk.

We gave the present to Chris and Cathi (btw, someone should compliment me on how creative and pretty my wrapping is. I'm getting tired of complimenting myself!) and then had a big ol' lunch at Stinky Shoe. mmm... beef and broccoli and crab rangoons... drool...

And after lunch and another trip to Downtown Disney (this time window shopping on the West Side), we went grocery shopping. The trip was going swimmingly right up until Aisle 10. Scott picked up a bag of cat food, and it wasn't sealed, and the w h o l e bag poured out into the floor. OMG, I thought I was going to pee myself right then and there. We, good citizens that we are, told a cashier that we dumped out a bag of food before running off to Aisle 11.

In the parking lot, we were loading the groceries into the trunk and Scott told me to throw the scissors into one of the grocery bags so that we'd remember to take them upstairs. So I threw them in the bag with the cat food.

Oh cat food, why have you forsaken us??

As we were unloading the groceries at home, two of the bags were stuck together. My first thought was that something sticky had opened up and it was going to be all over the trunk.

Nope.

The scissors had poked through the bag with the cat food and lodged themselves in the bottom of a styrofoam tray of pork chops in another bag. And for the second time in less than an hour, I had a near-pee laughing experience involving cat food.

Did Someone Say Hula Girl??

Scalzi's Monday Photo Shoot: Someone in your house you probably have one (or more) bobble-head figurines. Immortalize them in photo. For this, any bobbly toy will do -- bobbly hula girls, toy animals with bobbly tails, it's all good. They just have to be bobbly somewhere along the line.

I just KNEW I should've logged on and checked for the Photo Shoot before Scott and I left the house today! We saw a super-cool Captain Jack bobblehead at one of the gift shops at the Disney-MGM Studios today. And I would've taken a picture of it if I had known it would have a purpose later on!

Alas, we do have some manner of spring-loaded dust collector on the bookshelf: a porcelain hula girl and boy (she hulas... he just sits there), ordered from an actual Hawaiian shop online. This was actually a very cool purchase to get in the mail, because the box was stuffed with crumpled newspapers with Hawaiian news. What can I say? It's the little things that amuse me!

Why did I order a hula girl and have it delivered across the Pacific, and then the Continental U.S.? Well you see, it matched the island theme we were going for with our wedding reception. I loved the fact that the boy and girl were on the same base (not standard for hula girls), and that it wasn't the same old boring bride & groom sitting on top of the cake.

Actually, the cake was probably my favorite part of our wedding reception. Four layers, each decorated with a different type of seashell (real... definitely not edible), with a freakin' HULA GIRL on the top. I bet you've never seen one like it!

The World

I must say I've been kicking around blog ideas for a while now, but I don't really feel like I have more than two sentences worth to say about anything outside my life. I know I'm a "life blogger," but it's nice to throw in something else every now and again. But really, it's all just a little depressing to me:

THREE school shootings in a week, including one freaky old guy who sexually assaults a handful of high school girls before shooting one; and one freaky old guy who, still bitter about something that happened in his childhood, went into a one-room Amish schoolhouse and shot up a bunch of little girls. Man, I know the Amish aren't big on modern technology, but I hope that they're open to therapy. Those kids are going to need lots of it.

And then there's the Congressman talking dirty to teenage boys over AIM. You know, the one on the committee dealing with creepy old men chatting up teens online. How special is that?

And there's that football player who got mad and stomped on the other player's helmet-less face. He got a five-game suspension without pay. You know what? He makes almost $200,000 in five days. Perhaps that's not a big enough punishment. Perhaps they should force him to check into some inpatient facility for anger management. And I really hope the other guy decides to press charges.

And, closer to home, this guy shot two cops and a K9 before hunkering down in the woods. I don't believe that the death penalty is good, but I was strangely satisfied to know that there would be no trial for this guy. Although 60+ bullet holes in his body from 9 different SWAT officers seems a bit more like an execution than reasonable force.

Anyway, the world all of a sudden seems much more dark and sinister to me. Perhaps this is why I don't watch the news.

Happy October!

Last night was a big night at work. See, our prices go up starting today, and we (I) had a lot of extra stuff to do to prepare for this momentous occasion. I had to...

Change the prices at the bottom of the menus after second seating

Get the Chef to make up tomorrow's menu a day early so that the seaters could post it in the lobby last night

Get FOH manager to approve price changes proposed by Chef for surcharge items

Make a new sheet of pricing/tax/tip breakdown for the other reservationists (ask Scott about this - I was so proud I sent him the spreadsheet - I taught myself how to do a two part formula in Excel). This shows the cost of every combination of 1-6 people, partaking in 1-6 wine pairings, what the tax is, what the tip is, and what the total for your dinner will be.

E-mail said document to Management and Chefs

The new chart took me about a day to do (inbetween my other duties), and I just took the initiative to do it. It makes me look good, and since I'm no longer unionized it's in my best interest to look like a go-getter who takes on extra tasks and deserves a raise some day. Right?

Well, the short term payoff is that I was walking through the kitchen last night and they gave me two bites of food. Not just any food -- lobster. Not just any lobster -- French blue lobster (blue shell, not meat...yes I asked) with a chaser of potato puree. Honestly, I don't *love* lobster the way most other people do. It was good, but not $40/lb good. I do SO love the potatoes though. I've gushed about them before, but WOW!

Believe it or not, the lobster was not the culinary highlight of my day. That honor goes to the forbidden fruit - the McDonald's cheeseburger I ate on the way home. Half of my dinner had a really gamey taste (umm..."gamey" sounds better than "wet dog" right?) so I didn't eat it. I stopped on the way home for Happy Meals for me and Scott and an extra cheeseburger for me. It was pure food ecstasy. Food nirvana. Foodgasmic.

What can I say? I'm a simple girl with deep-fried taste.

Happy October!

Recipe for Laughs

I stumbled on something last night that made me laugh so hard that I made Scott stop watching TV to read it. And even he ended up belly-laughing.

Now that I've given it such a great set-up, I wanted to put up a disclaimer: if you read it and don't laugh, you have no sense of humor. Oh yeah, and it's about a year old, so there's a chance you may have stumbled upon it long ago.

Amalah.com Company Cookbook

Amalah is one of the four or five blogs I read daily that aren't on the list on the right side of the page. Since Chase N Kids no longer exists, nor do about half of my friends' blogs, my sidebar desperately needs a makeover. Perhaps I'll do that tomorrow. So keep your eyes peeled - most of the ones I'm adding are darn funny, and everyone needs a laugh!

Stop Complaining!

I e-mailed Scott yesterday before my shift started and told him I wasn't going to complain about work this week. I said, "it's only 4 days. I can handle 4 days."

Three hours later I was pitching a fit about something.

Honestly, I blame my years in the Call Center for this. Those women were champion complainers.

What set me off was some lady I called (because she had booked a same-day reservation and one member of their party had a "severe allergy" and the reservationist didn't say WHICH member of the party) yelled at me and told me to call her back in 10 minutes. Biotch! I didn't even get to tell her who I was or why I was calling. Eleven minutes later when I called her back and identified myself, she was perfectly nice and even apologized for her bad attitude.

You never get a second chance to make a first impression. Lucky for her, I won't remember her in a few more days. So never say never, I guess.

A Horse of a Different Color

Scalzi's Monday Photo Shoot for the week asks for horses: Horses are nice. Show us a horse picture you've taken. It can be new, or one from your files. It just needs to have a horse in it. Donkeys, mules, ponies, zebras, and quagga are also acceptable, and I'll be impressed if you have a picture of a quagga in your files, being that they've been extinct for 125 years and all.

Sadly, though I went to 3 years worth of equine summer camp, have gone on trail rides in the Tetons and in Vermont, and even took weekly lessons for a while, I do not have one single picture of me on a horse. And I don't even have any pictures of the zebras or even okapi at Animal Kingdom. (yes, I know the okapi are relatives of the giraffe... but they still look half-zebra). I do, however, have pictures of some Disney horses:


The only people who get to see the Headless Horseman gallop down Main Street U.S.A. are those who pay for the after hours "Mickey's Not So Scary Halloween Party." It's quite an impressive sight -- this giant horse goes galloping right past you, and wow - that man has no head! This may look like a pony, but it's actually a miniature horse. He(?) lives at the petting farm at Ft. Wilderness - the Tri Circle D Ranch. The ranch is also the home of the other horses on this page, plus the white ponies that pull Cinderella's Coach. You can't really see it in the picture, but the horses are branded with the "Tri Circle" logo, which looks an awful lot like Mickey Mouse.

And what display of Disney Horses would be complete without a shot of the horse-drawn carriage in front of Cinderella's Castle? There's a few "hidden mickeys" on this horse's harness as well. Can you spot them?

Note: the Horseman photo was taken by Mike, whose last name I cannot remember. Sorry Mike!

Banned Books

I wrote about Banned Books Week last year, and didn't really intend to devote a post to it again this year, but since I just got back from having my teeth cleaned and my entire mouth feels as though it was in its own personal earthquake, and because I absolutely love the BBW poster this year, I thought I'd mention it.

I continue to be shocked that Harry Potter, A Light in the Attic, and Where's Waldo are on the list. I get that the Jesus Freaks hate the HP books (not that I support a ban) but what, exactly, is wrong with a book of kid-friendly poetry? And Where's Waldo? Unless he's in a porn shop or Jeff Dahmer's kitchen, I can't IMAGINE why he's been banned!

My throbbing gums are preventing any further intelligent analysis, so, umm...

Go read a banned book!