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23 August, 2011

Murderer

I killed a bird this morning on my way to work.  Scott and I talked about filming a dramatization, but we're probably going to be too busy for the next few days so you'll just have to rely on your imagination.

There I am driving down the road when a little bird swoops down from the other side of the road and hits the front of my car with an echoing thud that actually resonated a bit like a gong.  I did what I always do in this situation (this is the 3rd bird, and 4th animal, I've hit in my driving career): I immediately craned my neck to get a good look in my rearview mirror to see the damage.

No bird behind me.  Did it bounce off onto the shoulder?  But before I even had a chance to consider that perhaps I had a new hood ornament, the bird must have dislodged from my bumper.  While I was still focused on the view behind the car, the bird rolled up the hood and thud thud thud up and over my windshield.

I actually yelled "oh my GOD!" and in retrospect am shocked I didn't crash the car.  I was stunned and freaked the heck out. The resulting adrenaline dump got me to work, but the mental crash was awful.  I hope that never happens to me (or another bird) again... but if they don't stop swooping in front of me I guess we don't have much of a choice! 

12 August, 2011

The Never-Ending Tooth Problem

I've got what can best be described as a "problem tooth."  The first problem with this tooth was back in January 2007.  That's when my dentist saw a small cavity.  According to this blog post from March of that year, the small cavity wasn't filled in time (through no fault of my own) and needed a root canal, which took 2 appointments to complete and then got infected.  Ironically, at that time I was referring to this as the never ending cavity.  If only I had known...

Right after the crown was put on, I was convinced there was a problem. I kept cutting my tongue on a sharp spot on the inside, but the dentist poked, x-rayed, and otherwise inspected and said there was no problem with the crown.

Fast-forward to August of 2010.  The crown on the problem tooth had cracked and was starting to crumble away. I returned to the dentist, and he decided to have a new lab-made crown made.  He put a temporary seal on top of the tooth, and sent me on my way.  I was supposed to return the following Monday to have the new crown put on, and took the day off to accomplish this.  They called me Monday morning to cancel because the lab hadn't returned the new crown.  The woman who called me was rude, didn't apologize, and didn't call back to reschedule once the crown came in.  When I e-mailed and brought the terrible customer service to the attention of the dentist, he e-mailed me back and basically said "don't come back."

So I didn't.

And unfortunately I waited until early this year to finally make an appointment with another dentist.  And then it took until April for the new crown to be made and cemented into place.  It hurt the day he put it in.  When the assistant dry-fitted the crown, it felt like it was too big.  The dentist just jammed it in and said it was fine.  It felt like the crown had little barbs on the bottom that were digging into my gums.

It was sensitive, but I sort of shrugged and figured it was all part of the healing process.  Then I started to notice that occasionally when I bit down on that side that there was some sort of "old man denture breath" liquid squeezing out.  After the first two wisdom teeth were removed (on the opposite side of my mouth), that tooth got super sensitive.  My dentist took a look and said "crown looks good," but perhaps there was a secondary infection under the tooth that would require an endodontist to re-drill the tooth.  When he suggested we wait a few weeks, I was happy to oblige.

When I had the other two wisdom teeth removed, I mentioned that the tooth was no better.  He said maybe it's just crowded in my (small) mouth and that removing the wisdom teeth would help.  It didn't.  So finally I got a referral to an endodontist.

Two weeks ago I went to the endo, who took a look at the x-ray and said the root canal was beautiful and that the problem was with the crown.  After talking to me, and sensing my displeasure at the idea of being sent back to my dentist, he recommended a course of treatment that would rely solely on a periodontist.  (at this point I encourage you to look into the term "tooth lengthening" or "crown lengthening," but not to click on wikipedia)  I got a call from the endo's office on my way home, and she said that my regular dentist said he could do that procedure in office.  Yeah.  Right.

I got a referral to the periodontist for this morning, and went for a combo consultation & treatment appointment.  Imagine my lack of surprise when he removed my crown and asked, "was that temporarily cemented, or was it supposed to be permanent?" I laughed out loud.  Well, I guess that explains the smell!

So after today's procedure (which really wasn't bad at all), my crown was temporarily cemented back into place.  I go back in 10 days for a post-op appointment (oh - haha - I'm not allowed to brush or floss that tooth until then. thanks for the special mouthwash, doc!), and the crown isn't going to be permanently cemented back into place for "a few months."

Four years, four dentists, and well over $1,000 out-of-pocket later, I am ready to be done with this process.  My jaw is still numb, but I have a good feeling that perhaps this time will be the beginning of the end of this saga.  (and yes, Scott just brought me a chair to knock on)  I'm hoping to be able to chew on both sides of my mouth again in a few weeks.  For now, nothing sharp like chips or popcorn (or cereal, I guess), and a few days without a straw or hot drinks or spicy food.  Gee...it's like having another wisdom tooth removed!

01 August, 2011

Putting the "Trip" in Road Trip

Scott and I have an event to attend in New Jersey this fall.  No matter how we sliced it, plane tickets were going to end up costing us more that I felt we could spend (and that was before I got my transcript out of hock). So we decided to take a little more time off from work and make the drive.  Even if gas was $4/gallon by then, we'd still be spending less than the airfare and rental car would cost.  But really, anyone who has ever driven up I-95 knows how miserable the DC to Philly leg is.  No matter what, the traffic is terrible and the drivers are hostile.  So today I had a crazy idea that might not be so crazy after all. Working with the following parameters: Work on Monday, event on Saturday morning, home on Tuesday here's what I'm thinking:

Monday afternoon: leave immediately after work and get at least an hour into Georgia before finding a place to spend the night

Tuesday: arrive in Atlanta by noon at the latest, spend 4-5 hours at Scott's Happy Place (the Georgia Aquarium), and then spend 3-4 hours headed North before finding a bed.

Wednesday: driving day! 9-10 hours to reach State College and spend the night some place walking distance from the PSU campus

Thursday: spend a couple of hours exploring Penn State and showing Scott the interesting touristy places and things.  And getting ice cream.  Leave State College and drive 4 hours to Philly, hopefully early enough to see my Grandpop.

Friday: something touristy in Philly before heading to the Jersey Shore.

Saturday morning: The Event. We'll be on the road southbound by 4 pm, and hope to make it south of DC before crashing for the night.

Sunday: drive straight down I-95 to Hilton Head, SC in time to go to dinner at Red Fish (no lie, we went there in 2008 and Scott is still talking about this place!) and crash at the Disney resort there.

Monday: drive home and get ready to go back to work on Tuesday.

I'm not deluding myself - it's A LOT of driving. Google tells me the route above is just over 2,500 miles, but the Orlando-Philly trip would be 2,000 miles round-trip. And this way the whole trip feels like a vacation instead of 2 long days in the car on I-95 with a few relaxing days in between.  It also gives us the chance to revisit the "best of"our other out-of-state trips and hit some places Scott has never been.

Of course, we still have a fair amount of time between now and then.  Lots could change. Heck, this vacation is on version 4.2 already!  Still, these plans are really exciting to both of us start to finish, which definitely makes the extra miles worth it.

Anyone want to play devil's advocate?

27 July, 2011

Laughing at the Past

Guess what I got today!  OK, don't really guess.  I got an official copy of my transcript.  The news contained, while not great, was actually better than I'd expected.  My last two semesters didn't count at all (Fall because I got a "trauma drop" of all my classes because of the bus accident...and I think I would've failed them all anyway, and Spring because my Dad never paid the tuition and I was never officially enrolled in any classes).  Financially that sucked, but it's a lucky break because I don't have two straight semesters of F's on there.  Even with that "good" news, I still left with a pretty dismal 2.2 GPA, and only 82 credits completed.

But the transcript provided some good laughs for Scott and me this afternoon.  I mean, I don't remember taking Arthurian Legend (D) or Astronomy (B-), but apparently I did.  I vaguely remember Genetics, Ecology and Evolution (B), which was basically a re-hash of AP Bio.  Scott was dismayed to learn that I got a D in Criminology, but I did get a B+ in Intro to American Criminal Justice 2 years earlier (which I also don't remember).  Honors Freshman Comp? B+ Three semesters of Italian? C, C+, C+.  My proudest semester was the last one I passed: Summer of '99, when I got a B+ and an A in two 400-level communications classes and an A- in nutrition.

Mostly, looking at the transcript just makes me sad.  My priorities were never what they should have been, and that I passed any classes at all after my Freshman year shows how damn smart I was, because I almost never went. And having taken 11 years to dig out of the financial catastrophuck I left behind, I wish that I could go back and smack some sense into my 18-year-old self and also go back and (while not blaming them) tell my parents to force me to show them my grades at the end of the semester.

But that's enough of looking backwards.  I'm keeping my fingers crossed that I'll be able to start taking classes again in January, though thinking about it for more than two minutes at a time makes me nauseous.    I'm hoping that the re-applying process is quick and painless so that I can actually make plans (and find out how much more I have to go) instead of this purgatory I'm in now. 

26 July, 2011

Definitely Not Free, but Clear

So...I spent $2,520 today and am having a bit of buyer's remorse.  Perhaps because I don't have anything to show for it.  Literally nothing, not even a receipt!

Actually, more than buyer's remorse, I have a little bit of pride and a lot of cautious optimism.  Pride, because I have officially paid off every last cent of college debt (two years after I found out about the last 252,000 cents I owed) (and not counting the personal loan that I got two years ago, which still has almost three years left on it). Cautious optimism because I no longer have any financial holds on my transcript, which means I'm free to continue my education.  There is a hold on there, but I just needed a note from the DoE that said my Perkins loans were paid off. They said they'd fax it over to Penn State in two business days.

Would you like to hear the ironic part?

After a few hours of Google searching (that's how one picks a school nowadays, right?), the most intriguing degree program I found is from Penn Freaking State's online campus!  At least most of my credits would transfer... theoretically... if I were to be accepted... and get some more lovely student loans that I promise not to default on as long as I live, so help me God.  Anyway, I'm still looking, and I'm not going to talk more about the degree or anything until I have a plan in place.  You know, a plan that will cost more money and take more time and brainpower than I've put in to anything in about... umm... ever.

But, you know, cautious optimism.

*vomit*

14 July, 2011

Slippery When Wet (with blood)

The dentist had trouble removing my last wisdom tooth.  The top-left one pretty much popped right out (along with the filling on the tooth in front of it.  see you again Monday morning, Doc!), but the bottom-left one was holding on for dear life.  This was the least "erupted" of all of them, and the one I was dreading the most, so I wasn't entirely surprised. 

I was, however, surprised when he stuck the large fancy dental pliers in my mouth one more time and the tooth popped out like a watermelon seed at a spittin' contest (too... much... time... in... Florida!).  I laughed, a hearty single "HA!" at the sight of the dentist recoiling in horror and the click click as it bounced on the floor.  It also felt it hit my hair on the way down, and checked for a bloody toothprint when I got home, but there was none.

Anyway, I'm home now, most of the numbness having worn off.  I still hate the taste of blood (remedy: lots of water drinking - but not swishing), and am still grossed out by the same things that grossed me out last time.  Luckily for me, the tooth I'm having the most trouble with is also on the left side, so I'm thinking I'll be on solid food on the right side faster than I was last time.

For now, bring on the yogurt and pudding! (whilst I enjoy the smell of Scott's lunch)

12 July, 2011

One of Those Days

The following happened between 7:00 and 8:00 this morning:

* I walked out of the house, locking the door behind me, only to discover the my keys (house and car) were still inside.  This, ladies and gentlemen, is why we have a key stashed in the garage.
* I narrowly avoided being hit head-on by a speeding dirt truck who was in my lane "sharing the road" with a bicyclist.
* I narrowly avoided being side-swiped by a convertible BMW merging onto my road off of the local toll road.  I recognized this car because he zoomed past me a few days ago on my way in. Apparently road rules don't apply to BMW convertibles.  I know where he works...considered leaving a note, but couldn't come up with wording that wouldn't get me fired.

The following happened between 8:00 and 8:30 this morning:
* I found out that the trainer I had scheduled for a class with 6 learners called in, and that I would need to cancel the class.
* The new guy who started yesterday had parked himself in my office waiting for something to do. His stuff was on my desk when I got in, and he literally hovered over my shoulder while I got logged in.  He's a nice guy. I blame this morning's little incident on the fact that he is brand new to the company and his manager likes to pawn off work on other people. "Just see Jamie in the morning - she'll get you set up" doesn't fly when his regulatory training is done.  OJT is out of my jurisdiction.

While none of these individually were such a big deal, my defenses were down *cough*PMS*cough* and everything together was more than I wanted to handle. 

I did have some bright spots, including well-meaning co-workers bringing me some pretzel m&m's, a lunch to celebrate something awesome that happened yesterday (which gave me indigestion...sigh...), and a new electric stapler by the copy machine that has a red light on the front (which I have named K.I.T.T.).

Still, now I'm home with no desire to go back and do it all tomorrow.  I'm tired and defeated, and the only thing stopping me from crying my eyes out is the knowledge that I have no good reason to cry my eyes out (tell that to my sad gland though).

And thus concludes my whine. Sorry if you tuned in expecting something interesting or non-pathetic.  I hear I'm having my left wisdom teeth removed on Thursday...perhaps that will yield something interesting.

13 June, 2011

Extracted

A few months back, the first time I visited our new dentist, 'removal of wisdom teeth' was once again added to my treatment plan.  (With my last dentist, I went so far as to visit an oral surgeon for the initial consult, but with our HMO they had to submit the paperwork to the insurance before the insurance would approve the procedure.  The paperwork got screwed up, and I wasn't in any hurry to have this done, so I just pretended the whole thing never happened rather than follow up. Scott's paperwork went through just fine a few months later, and he survived having his taken out just fine. That still didn't inspire me to go through it all.)

Anyway, the new dentist said he could take them out in-office, under novocaine but not anesthesia, two at a time.  And so I asked Facebook if anyone could think of a reason why I shouldn't go this route and save myself $500 or more.  Aside from a few people with "ooh - dentist - scary" reactions, there really weren't any.  So the next time I went in, I scheduled the first two to be pulled - #1 and #32 on the right side.

And now I'm going to attempt to post the juicy part of the story behind a "jump break" to spare anyone who can't bear the horror of what goes on when most people are asleep in the chair.  I personally don't think it's so bad, but Scott seemed to get a little squirmy when I told him parts of it.

07 June, 2011

All Jamie All the Time

(a book-end post)

Well, it took me about a zillion refreshes over multiple days (during which I found out a connect-seven of Scott pictures isn't nearly as uncommon as I originally suspected), but I finally got an all-Jamie banner:

And because I know you're dying to know, these pictures are from a pretty good variety of places: 10-year Disney party, our room on the Disney Dream, 10-year Disney party, Disney Magic character breakfast, Animal Kingdom (by the hippo viewing window at Pangani), FL Aquarium, and Castaway Cay/Disney Dream.

And now I can stop endlessly refreshing my own blog!

03 June, 2011

All Scott, All the Time

I just noticed that all of the pictures in the gallery at the top of the blog currently contain Scott.  I can definitively say that I have never seen this happen before!
 

Also of note: only one picture contains any sort of booze.  It seems most of the time when there is a camera-worthy occasion, there is also beer and wine.  Or a mojito.  Or a margarita.  Refresh the screen a few times and you'll see what I mean.  I guess we're both special occasion photographers and special occasion drinkers!

And in case you were wondering, the photos would be labeled "cruise, cruise, cruise, Epcot, Sea World, Studios, cruise."  Or more specifically, "Disney Wonder emergency drill, Castaway Cay/Disney Dream, Castaway Cay/Disney Dream, Epcot parking tram, Sea World penguin building, Mama Melrose's at the Studios, Disney Magic atrium."

I often find myself refreshing the blog whenever I'm blue or bored and wanting to jog happy times back into my brain, so that's why I'm so sure I've never seen this happen before.  It's like I won the Flickr slot machine or something!

24 May, 2011

PotD: Almost Empty Nest

I know this photo is less than great, but I was so excited to see "my babies" AND an adult this morning when I left for work that I had to snap a picture. This is the first time I've seen any of them in over a week, and I wouldn't be surprised if it's the last time.

All grown up and flying away...sigh...
Sent on the Sprint® Now Network from my BlackBerry®

13 May, 2011

Repressed

A quick read through the updates on my favorite blogs last night brought up a long-repressed memory.  The blog post in question was about the world's most awkward date, college dorm style.  And I'd like to share my own awkward date with you, but first two caveats:

* Yes, I was young and stupid.  Not all young and stupid girls end up on the business end of a bloody scimitar. Some of us were also lucky.
* I acknowledge that this might not be funny to you.  I was drifting off to sleep last night when my eyes popped open and I started laughing out loud.  I told Scott the story, more of the story than I'm going to include here, through laughter-induced tears.  He wasn't laughing along.  Maybe it's just not funny?

The story takes place very early in my Freshman fall semester at Penn State.  I know that because it wasn't yet jacket weather, and because the story starts in the dining hall at breakfast time and I was alone.  Breakfast quickly became a social-or-skipped event for me.  So anyway, there I am alone eating my breakfast when I am approached by a pair of guys who want to share my table.  One is a generic fleshy white guy (picture the guy next to me in this picture.  for example only. it wasn't actually him. I can't stress that enough as the story goes on!) and the other is a scrawny Indian guy.  They're friends or roommates or something, computer science or math geeks, and the white guy is incredibly chatty.

Somehow, in some details I continue to repress, I end up accepting an invitation to a concert from the generic fleshy guy.  And to be clear, when I say "concert," I actually mean Glee Club concert.  The Penn State Glee Club, as I'd discover my sophomore year, is an incredibly talented, and mostly gay, group of guys who throw a really fun party.  That night, however, I was simply impressed with their talent.

There was rain.  I don't know if it was raining the whole time, or if it started to rain as we left the concert.  All I know is that "Guy" and I were soaked to the skin.  The logical thing to do, apparently, was for us to go to his dorm, because it was closer than mine.  And he decided to get changed.

He got changed right in front of me.

And didn't do the gym class shuffle either.

He got completely naked, in all his white fleshy glory.

And so I did what any Jamie in this situation would do: pretend it wasn't happening.  Keep talking and FOR THE LOVE OF GOD, don't look! Naked guy? What naked guy? No naked guy here!  And so, while he's all naked in front of me (you couldn't open the closet and use the door as a shield???), he's talking about being naked.  He's talking about nature and how nudity is normal and natural and I'm all "uh huh...mm hmm...HOLY SHIT DO ALL GUYS IN COLLEGE JUST GET NAKED AT THE DROP OF A HAT?"  I'm descended from actual Quakers, guys.  The good, decent people of my heritage do not think that there is anything normal about stripping in front of strangers.  We have a healthy dose of prude, and we think full-body covering is completely natural.

Obviously, there was no reciprocal nakedness from me.  Though the remaining details of the evening have been blissfully removed from my memory, I can assure you of that.  "Sweet Seventeen and never been naked in front of a stranger," as the song goes.

I do remember him implying, either that night or some time after, that we were dating.  (perhaps he didn't just drop his drawers for just any Glee Club groupie after all?)  I kindly set the record straight, telling him that I wasn't ready to commit to just one person, that I was young and still finding my way around school and blah blah blah...

About a month later (maybe less?), I was in the company of Guy - please don't ask me to recall the remaining details - and the subject of my boyfriend Evan came up.  Guy looked completely heart-broken. "I guess you're ready to commit now?"  Umm...well...you see...when a girl isn't interested in a boy, she says she's not ready to be in a relationship. She doesn't just come out and tell him that his nakedness traumatized her to an extent that she won't fully realize until she's in her 30's.

I guess all boys don't know this?

Fact

I am funny, y'all.

That is all.

11 May, 2011

PotD: Sword Not Included


Sometimes the jokes just write themselves...which is a good thing, because mine aren't very witty! 

Above is an actual vending machine from an actual women's room I visited today.  I decided to file this image on the blog, since yesterday I shared a picture of a weird ad on a tampon box (plus my own stellar commentary) on Facebook and didn't get one single "like."  Anyway, on to the bad jokes:

  • For the unprepared knight
  • "They were all out of scabbards...I hope this will work"
  • (Sword not included)
  • Now made with 0% absorbent steel!
  • Won't clash with your chastity belt!
  • Probably won't prevent stabbing, but at least no one will see you bleed!
These have gone from bad to worse.  It might be time for me to stop.  Got any others?

08 May, 2011

Driving Queen

How long does a ride in the car have to be to qualify as a road trip?  For me and Scott, I believe the answer is the distance between Orlando and Tampa.  Including the stop & go traffic at 'malfunction junction,' (if you've been there, you know where I mean) we're in the car for well over an hour.  That's plenty of time to sing along with the radio, drive fast, and get silly.  On a recent trip to Tampa we learned the following:

* I still know every word to Debbie Gibson's "Only in my Dreams," yet can't remember what I wore three days ago.
* "The Music and the Mirror" from A Chorus Line is a car-dance-a-palooza!  I was driving down I-4 when the song came on, and during the lyric-less portions of the song I launched into some crazy one-handed dancing (the other hand on the wheel of course).  There were jazz hands, Vogue poses, and all sorts of ridiculousness.  Scott says the guy in front of us probably thought I was waving at him.  I think I looked more like I was having a rhythmic seizure!
* Scott knows most of the words to "The Humpty Dance."  I know two lines, besides the chorus: "my name is Humpty, pronounced with an umpty," and "my nose is big, big like a pickle."
* Thanks to my free trial of XM radio, we had plenty of commercial-free radio to choose from.  Since I made Scott my "music navigator," I also let him program the last 12 pre-set buttons.  I can almost completely skip the second page of pre-sets, since they include Bollywood, Greatful Dead, and Margaritaville (where, by the way, I have yet to hear a Buffett song).

We were down in Tampa to see Shrek the Musical at the Straz Center.  It was pretty good.  The caliber of the performers was top-notch, as were the staging and sets/effects.  The show was amusing, and didn't rely on the jokes from the movie as much as I'd expected (but still included the "Welcome to Duloc" song, which cracked me up).  It got long-winded in Act Two though, and I found myself wondering how much longer it would be.  And of course, I should mention that children who are too young to sit through the 90-minute movie without talking probably shouldn't be going to the two-hour live show.  Especially when tickets in the cheap seats are $50 or more.  I had a small child directly behind me, and two - including one who couldn't have been 3 - to my left.  The whining and talking was almost too much to bear.

For the Birds

Here's a bit of randomness for you on a Sunday morning:
(and if the video doesn't embed, which the preview suggests it won't, here's the link)

03 May, 2011

Where Were You When...

The bathroom.

Both times.

September 11, 2001: I was in the bathtub shaving my legs (yes, two momentous events at once. shut up!) when my dad knocked on the bathroom door and said he thought something big was happening, and that a plane had crashed into the World Trade Center. “Was it an accident?” “I don’t think so.” He had that tone of voice that said “I’m remaining calm on the outside but freaking the f--- out on the inside.” I don’t for sure remember the words – or even whether he mentioned the Pentagon or the second plane in New York – but I’ll always remember the voice.

May 1, 2011 May 2, 2011: I was on the toilet reading my e-mails. It’s my morning ritual – I stagger out of our bedroom and down the hall to “my” bathroom and pet Elphie while I pee. Then I sit there and read my e-mails and sometimes Facebook on my phone before I get in the shower. Scott had sent me two e-mails, and I got the second one first – “no French toast, up late watching the news” or something like that. And then the first e-mail actually explained what was going on. Most of my Facebook stream was updates from ABC News, with a few friends’ reactions scattered through. I’m still not quite sure why Scott sent the two e-mails (while laying in bed right next to me) rather than wake me up, but there you have it.

Anyone else have a bare-bottom story involving bin Laden? On second thought, never mind. I’d rather not know!

02 May, 2011

Statutory

This is one of those stories Scott just won't see the charm/humor in. Below is a conversation between me and one of the guys who work in my building. He's probably 20 years older than me and is one of those people who do a tight-rope walk on the line between friendly/flirty and harassment.

Him: you *really* look great in that! 20 years ago you'd be in trouble.
Me: 20 years ago you'd be in jail. I was 12!
Him: oh...huh!

I'll take my flattery with a side of dirty old man, please!
Sent on the Sprint® Now Network from my BlackBerry®

Not to be a Buzz Kill...

I awoke this morning to the news that Osama bin Laden is dead.

Kind of shocking, no?

Even more shocking is that he was living in a mansion, and not in a mountainous cave.  I guess we lost that bet!

I also awoke to the news of the American reaction: partying at Ground Zero and the White House.  They don't think this is over, do they?  I'm pretty sure bin Laden wasn't controlling his people with a Jafar-like magical staff, hypnotizing them to do his evil bidding.  This isn't the end, and in the short-term I worry that there's going to be a lot of hatred and violent intentions pointed straight at us.  I'm betting they had a contingency plan for an event like this.


Not actually Osama bin Laden
 ...I just hope that we know what's coming before it actually hits us.

So congratulations Navy Seals on your awesome job yesterday.  Let's all keep our eyes on the ball and hope they got some good intel out of that "cave" in "Afghanistan" and that this really does mean the end of this war is significantly closer than it was this time yesterday.  But remember, we're not there yet.

01 May, 2011

Thought for Food

The oven timer has about 45 minutes left on it, though dinner certainly isn't going to be before 5, since that's when Scott gets home from work.  I'm trying my hand at making Sunday pork ragout (a.k.a. my attempt at being an Italian grandmother, which is difficult, since I'm neither Italian nor have a grandmother to teach me how to make recipes from the old country!) again.  The last time I tried it, the pork was tasty, but not tender enough to shred, and the vegetables hadn't turned mushy enough even after a whirr with the stick blender. 

Flavor: B+, texture: C-, from-scratch potato gnocchi: D-

The recipe calls for a slow cooker, which I don't have.  So I found out what temperature "low" is on a slow cooker and cooked dinner in the oven in a heavy pot with a lid.  I read that "low" is 150-175, so last time I cooked the meat on 150, and then raised the temperature at the end to get it to safe eating temperature.  This time, I'm cooking it on 175 and not even thinking about testing for done-ness until 7 hours in.  I also cut my vegetables into smaller pieces - not quite a dice, but closer to that that the stew-worthy chunks I did last time.

It's a strange feeling for me, setting my alarm for 8 am on a Sunday to get up and chop veggies, brown an enormous chunk of meat, and stick dinner in the oven...and then to do morning things like shower and have breakfast.  I doubt I'd ever do this stuff regularly, but I do enjoy it occasionally.

When the timer goes off, I'm going to check the temperature of my meat and check the tenderness of my veggies.  And unlike last time, I'm not going to rush this.  If the stuff in the pot isn't ready, I'll stick it back in for another 45 minutes and not check again until then. 

...but I hope it's ready, because it smells really good and I'm already getting sort of hungry!

29 April, 2011

A Post That's Not About the Birds...But Does Include a Bird...Sort Of...

Do you ever have one of those moments where you look around and feel like you have stopped on the side of the highway of life and everyone else is flying past you in a shiny new car?  Oh no?  Me neither...

I had one of those moments earlier this week, and Scott and I agreed that I could have 24 hours to wallow ("it's like quicksand," I tried to explain to him, "you have to just be still. if you try to force yourself out of it you'll drown.").  It turns out I needed just about exactly 24 hours.  My rescue came in the form of 3 guys from China - ok, 2 from Hong Kong and 1 from Shanghai - and a strange and fun lunch.

There's a whole van full of the guys in town this week, taking a class from the training manager in my building (whose only connection to me and my job is a shared boss - it's a weird department!).  (guys, I WISH I could spill all about the class...and the classroom... it's so cool I wish I'd studied engineering or electronics or something in school. dang!)  The training manager invited me out to lunch "with the Hong Kong guys," and I figured I might as well go, if for no other reason than to pick on the baby-faced naive intern.  (Fridays are traditionally "Poke the Intern Day," but I had today off)

So I ended up at lunch at a table with the manager, the intern, and 3 guys from the other side of the planet.  The conversation ranged from their love of barbeque and Mexican food to geography and population density.  You know, just your average smalltalk!  Some highlights:

  • In Hong Kong, they use bamboo scaffolding when building high-rise buildings.  25 stories tall!  And there's no OSHA requirements for fall protection harnesses either!
  • The Hong Kong $10 bill isn't paper. It's paper-thin plastic that's sturdier than your average shopping bag, and it has a see-through spot on it.  The other bills are paper.
  • These guys must have learned their English from The Wizard of Oz.  Our conversation about the terrible storms north of us included the word "twisters."
  • China is shaped like a cock. (see the title of this post - I always get there eventually!)  The guy who currently lives in Shanghai was originally from Shandong Province. We asked where that was and he said "China is shaped like a cock. Shandong is in the chest of the cock."  I, thank the Lord, did NOT say "so is Florida!"  And also?  I couldn't remember the name of the province just now, only that it started with S, so I pulled up this map and was able to find it based on his description.  What do you know?!?
  • China has a desert. (this might be the part where I got to be the stereotypical ignorant American.  "there's desert in China?") Apparently it's up near Russia.
  • China has 31 provinces, and has 5 stars on its flag.  This came up because they said that they heard most Americans traveling abroad didn't know how many stars are on the US flag.
Anyway, it was great fun.  I left lunch with foreign money in my pocket (about $2 US) and had forgotten that I was sad.  I thought as a thank-you for the free money that I'd make some cookies for my new friends.  When I asked, one told me that he thinks chocolate chip cookies are too sweet, and I checked to see if they were ok with raisins and decided to make oatmeal-raisin cookies for them.  I dropped those off this afternoon.  I hope they liked 'em...

Also of possible interest to some of you, the 5-year pin from HKDL is the same as the domestic parks, but the opening team pin (they got them for the 5th anniversary celebration this year or last) and the nametag were very new and different to me.  Very cool!

19 April, 2011

Full Circle


It was November when I spotted this pair of bald eagles together for the first time.  In December, I realized that they were nesting.  The hatching probably happened in January, completely hidden from those of us on the ground.  I saw the chicks for the first time in February, and watched their fuzzy little heads sticking up more and more over the nest in March.  In the beginning of April, they all of a sudden looked like full-grown hawks.  And now, my baby birds are leaving the nest.  Today I saw both of them sitting on the tree where I met their parents.


I also saw something pretty awesome yesterday morning.  One of the eaglets was on the "daddy tree," and while I was watching took off on a short flight around the clump of trees.  In another few weeks, after they've learned to hunt and their wings get accustomed to longer flights, they'll leave the nest and never return.  Adults re-use the same nests fairly often, so maybe we'll get to do it all over again next year.  I hope so - I'm already lamenting the empty nest!

PotD: Triple Digits

Scott snapped this picture after work. On one hand, triple-digit temperatures (even in the parking lot) displease me greatly. On the other hand, we made it through most of April before the truly oppressive heat and humidity kicked in.

Small favors, right?
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17 April, 2011

Poacher!

The dog next door was barking like mad a little while ago.  She's not a barker by nature, so I figured there was somebody outside.  When I looked, there was Harley walking along with a fish in his beak that was about the size of my hand.  Harley's head, as you probably remember, is about the size of a ping pong ball.

I was upstairs and immediately galloped downstairs (yeah, about as graceful as you're picturing) to grab the camera.  When I got to the side window and opened the blinds, Harley was there but had put down the fish.  There was no way he was going to swallow this thing whole, so I guess he was going to pick at the flesh?  And so I focused the camera as well as I could through the screen and waited.  Before I could get a single picture, he flew away.  Without the fish.

What the...?

...and then an eagle landed on top of the fish!  That son of a gun is poaching fish from other birds!  OK, I get that he has two increasingly large mouths to feed that can't quite leave the nest to hunt for themselves, but it just seems such a cruel way to make a living.

(at this point I will refrain from pointing out how interesting it is that our forefathers chose the bald eagle as the symbol of our country - the predator that sees something it wants and takes that thing away from the 'lesser' creature that did all the work in the first place)

Anyway, I did manage to get two other pictures before lunch flew back to the nest.  Hope you enjoy them!
 


09 April, 2011

PotD: Ready

In the event of the Japanese Radioactive Tuna-pocalypse, we'll be ready to sell these babies on ebay for $50 a pop.

In our defense, we buy it when it's BOGO, and it's been BOGO a lot recently! 21 cans of tuna? Yeah, I'd say that's excessive!
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08 April, 2011

Vultures? Hawks? No, Eagles!

It's been just over a month since the last time I stopped and took pictures of the babies.  They're so big! And kind of ugly! But also kind of cute.  They sit up on the edge of the nest and occasionally flap their wings. It won't be long now before those wings start to work for real. I only hope that I'm able to get a picture of one of them actually out of the nest before they go away...

05 April, 2011

PotD: Hidden Mickey

Before we painted the garage, Scott had a spray-painted X on the wall that he'd use as a guide to know when his car was properly backed in.

We painted over the X.

And last night, on his first backing-in attempt, he hit my bike!

This Hidden Mickey is just a temporary fix, but one I have faith in. Fingers crossed...

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04 April, 2011

Happy Birthday Christina

I realized this morning that today is my baby sister's 10th birthday.

I haven't seen her since she was two.

This is the last picture I have with her.

I think we'd all agree that I don't casually toss around the word 'hate.'  Like most hateful words, I think it's a little stronger than is generally appropriate.  But today Christina kept drifting into my mind, and every time I had to make a conscious effort to not hate her mother.

This isn't the first time I've asked for strength to stop hating her.  See most of March 2006, or this extra-special entry from April of the same year for past examples. 

But unlike my fiery-hot rage of five years ago, this is different.  This is the quiet defeat of someone who has quite literally lost her family.  It's heart-break.  It's knowing that, in being the bigger person and not complaining to my dad about her back-stabbing and manipulation when I had the chance, I let her win.

This afternoon, I read a painfully beautiful account of how one of my favorite bloggers said goodbye to her dying father.  I cried for her, and then I found myself crying for me.  Honestly (and it's my own blog, so screw anyone who calls me selfish for this) I was jealous of her.  I was jealous that she had that kind of relationship with her dad.  And I was jealous that she was able to say goodbye.  I'm pretty sure that if my dad died tomorrow, I wouldn't be on the list of people who'd be notified.  Whenever I run into him, I find myself overwhelmingly grateful just to know that he's ok.  It's a pretty crappy way to go through life.

I don't know what Christina looks like now, how tall she is or whether her hair is still curly.  The last time I asked about her, Dad said she was on the honor roll.  Maybe she still is. I hope that she's happy, and that she turns out ok, despite living in Mother Gothel's alternate universe.

Happy birthday, baby sister.

PotD: Halfway There

Next weekend, I plan to tackle my half of the garage with (powder room) purple.

Can't wait!

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03 April, 2011

PotD: Work in Progress

We painted the garage yesterday - a beautiful solid coat of white. So today I'm scribbling all over the walls.

What do you think so far?

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31 March, 2011

PotD: Flooded

I took the route home from work that was least likely to flood out my car. Glad I didn't take the 2 lane country road!
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11 March, 2011

Sammiches

I made myself a peanut butter and jelly sandwich for breakfast yesterday morning.  There were only 3 slices of bread (plus the end pieces, which neither Scott nor I will eat), so I made it a double-decker. I ate it at my desk, and it was delicious.

Last night, I dreamt that I wanted another PB&J sandwich, but remembered that we were out of bread.  And lo, I turned my head and saw a previously unseen full beautiful loaf of bread on the counter.  "Now I can make a sandwich!"

I woke up this morning, eagerly anticipating that creamy rich peanut butter and delicious sweet grape jam, only to remember that there was, in fact, no bread in the house.  And I was sad.

I repeated the story at work, and nearly cried over my peanut butter deprivation.

I repeated the story to Scott when I got home, the sandwich-shaped hole in my heart still gaping.

And now I'm telling you.

Damn, I miss that sandwich. 

Playing Games

Currently, Scott and I are sitting in the living room together, he playing some sort of shoot-'em-up game, and me playing Tetris Battle on Facebook (WHY are the rest of you not playing this game???).  His game has a steady stream of background dialog that I believe is supposed to be radio chatter, but I don't know because I generally tune it out.

Me: "I could've sworn your game just said 'Panko's been hit!' and all I could think was 'not the breadcrumbs!'

Scott: ---

Nothing, not a snort or a grunt of acknowledgement, not even a 'shut up.'  I'm not sure whether he is actively ignoring me, or genuinely didn't hear due to an XBox coma.  In case it's the former, I think I'll just sit here quietly and talk to you nice folks.

So...

If you're overwhelmed by the magnitude of the disaster in Japan, might I recommend two of the funniest blog posts* I've read in ages...

But Wait! Breaking News! Scott's phone just beeped and he immediately looked at it.  He's definitely not in an XBox coma...must just be ignoring me.  Good to know!  (and no, Scott, I don't think you're being rude, so don't be offended. I just think it's funny that I'm currently conversing with you in this fashion)

The Drawer of Shame and Other Assorted Oddities, over at Jennsylvania is a brilliant piece of writing about what happens when your cat eats a meat-flavored piece of string.  I dedicate this link to Mr. French and the great turkey string incident of my childhood.

Ribbed...for Her Pleasure, from A Little Pregnant has a hysterical grouping of comments from her previous blog post.  They're mostly about assvice and other stupid things people were told when pregnant or trying to become so. The comments start about halfway down the post, and you can skip the first half if you're not interested in the context. 

Now if you'll excuse me, I'm going back to Tetris.

*granted, I tend to laugh a little harder when I'm trying to not be overwhelmed by sadness, but I still think these would be funny otherwise.

10 March, 2011

PotD: Might Rain!

I guess I won't be driving to work with my windows down...
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07 March, 2011

Just Because

Recycling: great for bottles and cans, less great for blogs.  That said, I feel that the previous post contained possibly the greatest run-on sentence ever and deserves another chance at the spotlight:
This project hasn't been easy so far - the carpet is fo' shizzle on the to-do list, since it's got some blue spots that'll probably never come out even with the use of the Kilo Memorial Steam Cleaner; Scott can barely lift his arms (apparently paint-rolling the ceiling uses muscles that he doesn't usually use); and I, as the designated cutter-inner, took so many trips up and down the ladder that my thighs are still burning.
It has urban slang, a reference to cat pee, and burning thighs.  I should've been an English major - this could be Beowulf for the 2010's, people! Now leave me a damn comment before I start posting YouTube videos of my childhood.

Too late!

04 March, 2011

PotD: Under Construction

Picture it: a room with a dark blue (some might call it "admiral blue") accent wall, the matching tray ceiling glowing with thousands of twinkling stars (or however many glow-in-the-dark stars come in the package...), a white ceiling fan cooling the air...

That's actually as far as the vision goes right now.  We've tentatively picked out the color that the rest of the room will be, and are debating ideas for new furniture.  (I *know* we need an awesome white headboard against that wall, Scott's pretty sure we don't want white because it'll look like a farmhouse, and I'm pretty sure I don't even want to put our existing bed back in there.)

What's on the wall now is just tinted primer, but I love it so much I worry that the actual color won't be as good.  Scott's convinced it's the same exact color, in which case why are we not just buying primer? Either way, "real" painting is tomorrow's project, and I. Can. Not. Wait!

This project hasn't been easy so far - the carpet is fo' shizzle on the to-do list, since it's got some blue spots that'll probably never come out even with the use of the Kilo Memorial Steam Cleaner; Scott can barely lift his arms (apparently paint-rolling the ceiling uses muscles that he doesn't usually use); and I, as the designated cutter-inner, took so many trips up and down the ladder that my thighs are still burning.  Oh - and if you attack a spot of blue paint on the white wall voraciously enough with a wet rag, it WILL come off, along with the white paint, leaving a spot of bare drywall behind.

For now, I'm enjoying our "vacation" in the office.  It's cramped - I'm typing this at the computer desk while sitting at the foot of the bed - but it's sort of fun to wake up and not see the same old things.  And perhaps sleeping in here will inspire our next paint decision...

03 March, 2011

32

Sometimes a girl is destined to try on a fancy dress.  After all, if it wasn't meant to be, it wouldn't have been on the rack in my size and I wouldn't have been wearing my clear-strap bra.

...and as I told Facebook, I justify this little "me time" by pointing out that 32 is really just two 16's.  I should have tried on TWO prom dresses!  And by the way, I love this dress WAY more than I loved my real prom dress, and possibly even more than my wedding dress.  Extra impressive when you consider Scott picked it out. I had my eye on a sparkly orange dress instead.

How appropriate that we went from the store to the theater for West Side Story.  I had to stop myself from singing along to 'I Feel Pretty!'

02 March, 2011

PotD: Party Wagon

Driving home feeling sleep-deprived after an overnight shift? I recommend transporting a bunch of balloons in your back seat. Not only will the swirling colors and lack of rearview mirror functionality keep your mind focused, but you'll also be continually bopped on the back of the head!
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26 February, 2011

PotD: on the ledge

Elphie enjoyed the open window weather this afternoon. Sadly, we came upstairs to an unbearably hot bedroom, so the air conditioner is on for the first time in 2011. Oh well, we enjoyed it while it lasted.

Right, Elph?
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25 February, 2011

PotD: 3 Weeks?


WE HAVE AN EAGLE BABY!!!  Actually, we may have two little chickie-poos up there, but we've only seen what looks to be the back of the head of the second one. (not visible above)

As thrilled as I am to finally have proof of life up there, I'm slightly disappointed to find that it (they?) is probably already 3-4 weeks old.  I came up with that from photos from this entry (3 weeks) and this entry (4 weeks) on the CCB Eagle Nest Blog. Those photos were taken in 2010, but there are 3 new eggs in their nest this year.  I'm totally hooked!

I'm going to exercise self-control and not post all zillion photos I took this afternoon.  But I can't resist showing one more - with the possible second eaglet in the left side of the nest. 


(hat tip to Scott, who was the first to notice the chicks in the nest)

24 February, 2011

PotD: Early

Pictured: the Orange County Courthouse at 7:20 this morning.

Not Pictured: Jamie, annoyed that she is 40 minutes early for juror report time.

Great time doing my civic duty today. Can't talk about it, which is a shame because the whole experience, as Mom predicted, would've been excellent blog fodder. Bonus: I didn't get picked for my jury, so I was out of there before noon and on my way back to work.
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23 February, 2011

PotD: Birds in Trees

Great egrets and wood storks look so silly up in the treetops. You'll just have to take my word, since this picture is so lousy!
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17 February, 2011

PotD: more fog

I miss seeing the road and the rest of the trees on my way to work. I hear it's going to be not much better tomorrow.

Sigh...maybe next week?
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16 February, 2011

PotD: Lunch Date

You can tell this ibis is used to people. The ones at the house would never come this close to people!
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14 February, 2011

PotD: Killer Instinct

Milo and Elph playing tag under the bathroom door.
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12 February, 2011

PotD: Bird Sex!

The sandhill cranes were out this morning, and I thought I'd try to replicate this picture, only with Elphie sitting in the doorway.  Unfortunately for me, the grill is further on the patio than usual, and got in my picture attempts.  But while I had the camera out, the bird closest to me flapped her wings wide. I lifted the camera to my eye to get a picture of the wingspan. The other bird jumped on her back. I snapped the picture. The second bird dismounted.


The whole thing took less than 30 seconds.  Scott missed it completely, though to his credit he did hustle back over when I said, "umm...I think they're mating!"  I actually Googled 'sandhill crane mating' to make sure that's what I had seen.  Yep - that's definitely bird sex.

Actually, it's been a big "circle of life" 24 hours here in the neighborhood, though all out-of-order.  On my way home last night, I stopped at the dumpster and snapped a picture of the eagle nest, complete with one bird peeking out the top.
And then around sunset, we spotted a sandhill crane family out front.  The colt is in the middle:

At this point, I think I'm done with wildlife photography for the weekend. But we're planning on heading out to enjoy the beautiful weather today, so who knows what we'll see?

11 February, 2011

PotD: Birds on a Wire


This photo was taken on Flamingo Crossings Blvd., where I have yet to see a flamingo!

09 February, 2011

PotD: "Sweet" Sunrise


Scott and I carpooled home last night, and therefore back in this morning. Since I'm not usually on that side of town at that time of day, I took the opportunity to snap the sunrise. Sadly, I think I missed the best colors by about 2 minutes. Stupid power lines!

On my way home this afternoon, on a road where the speed limit is a painful 20 MPH, I observed that Aerosmith's "Sweet Emotion" isn't nearly as cool going 20 in a Hyundai as it is going upside down in a roller coaster.

08 February, 2011

Crazy People

Scene: Waiting room of doctor's office
Time: 7:04 am

Man: I'm here for bloodwork...and whoever I'm with, make sure they know I'm really bad with needles.
Receptionist: (smiling) Just let them know when they come and get you. They'll take care of you.
Man: OK, because I can't handle needles at all.


Time: 7:08 am

Woman: Does he even know I'm here?
Receptionist: Excuse me?
Woman: Does he know I'm here? My appointment was at 7. I have to be at work at 7:30 and I can't wait much longer.

Time: 7:12 am

Nurse: Number 2061? (we are handed pagers when we check in, but rather than actually use the pagers, they use them like those take-a-number strips at the deli)
Woman from above: Do you know where Dr. M is?
Nurse: Do I... know where he is?
Woman: I had a 7:00 appointment and (rising from chair) forget it. I have to go. I'm going to be late for work. (slams pager down at reception desk and storms out)

Time: 7:25 am

Man from above: I'm really bad with needles.
Phlebotomist: Okay, no problem.
Man: No, I'm really bad with needles. So make sure I don't see one at all or I'll freak out.
Vampire: Okay...
Man: I once had one (pause for dramatic effect) break off inside me!
Vampire: Oh...wow...
Man: umm...
Vampire: did you have any water this morning?
Man: umm...no...
Vampire: ok, I'm going to go and get you some water and give you a chance to calm down.
Man: okay...
(Vampire grabs an empty styrofoam cup and literally bolts from the room.  Jamie, in the next chair over, realizes that this man is between her and the exit and wills her blood to pump out faster so that she can escape before he pukes)

These are verbatim conversations from this morning.  I'm not sure how the crazy woman EVER thought she'd be in and out of the doctor's office in 25 minutes or less (I'm giving her a minimum of 5 minutes travel time to work).  And really, if she starts at 7:30, she's done at 4. The doctor is open until 7 pm - why not schedule an after-work appointment?  You KNOW she went to her work location raving about the terrible service there.  And to think - she didn't even have a chance to sit in an empty exam room for a minimum of 10 minutes! 

As for the man, pardon the expression, but MAN UP!  Put on your big girl panties and suffer quietly. No one - not even the person doing the blood draw - gives a damn about how afraid you are of needles.  It's not going to make her do her job any more gently. If anything, it could make her nervous and end up hurting you even more.  Especially since the girl taking his blood is the one who blew out both of my elbow veins last time.

I wonder if they both survived?

PotD: Best Laid Plans

I tucked my gate remote into my car visor, thinking it would be a convenient place to store it. Great plan, up until the sun was in my eyes, I flipped down the visor, and my remote flew out and dangled there in front of my face. And then I almost crashed because I was laughing so hard.

I should probably move that...

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07 February, 2011

PotD: Weather

It's been like this all day. Blah...
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03 February, 2011

PotD: stage parents

I know this is a terrible photo, and it's blurry and impossible to read, but trust me to paraphrase: "I have so many talents and so many extracurriculars that my mom obviously puts certain members of Jamie's family to shame!" It's the bio of one of the 4 boys who play Billy in this show.

And also: scrape together your pennies and go see Billy Elliot. OMG, I can't remember the last time I went into a musical knowing next to nothing about it and fell so completely in love with it.

Let's hope Act II is just as good!
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02 February, 2011

A Little Change

Today's Photo of the Day... isn't really.  It's actually a PhotoShop of the Day.  And truth be told, it's not even that.  It's a clumsily doctored photo done on Paint.  With a back story.  So let's start there, and attempt to use full sentences with subjects and verbs.

(but before I start, in defense of my poor writing, I'd like to say that I'm sleep-wacky right now.  I worked midnight to 8:30 this morning, having had a 2-hour nap from 8-10pm, and then came home and slept from 10-4. that makes me not sleep-deprived, but definitely off-kilter a bit)

A few days ago, I got an e-mail from Scott with this photo attached (seriously, click the link) and a note that says "don't you want to see the picture where Ozzy bites his head off?"  And I thought yes...yes I do.

And before the "big reveal," I thought I'd mention that Scott met young Master Bieber a few years ago when he was supposed to be doing a fan meet and greet type of thing.  Scott was, to put it kindly, unimpressed with the kid's attitude towards his fans and his handlers.  To this day, it's fun to say "Bieber" and see what sort of face Scott makes.  To put this in perspective, he had a more positive impression of Charlie Crist!  So anyway, here's the loving gift I made for Scott:

01 February, 2011

PotD: Birds (not) on a Wire

I set out to take a picture of the birds on the light poles that I see every morning. The fog and the location of the sun pulled the focus, but I still think it's a pretty neat shot.
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