Three's Company...Four's a Crowd...Let's Have a Party!

Below is a snippet of a conversation this morning at work between me and a guy who also works in the building.

Him: what are you drinking these days? (he has some sort of booze hook-up and often brings in bottles to people at work)
Me: nothing really. I don't like to drink alone.

Me: well, I occasionally make Jell-O shots with vodka...
Him: we should go out for a drink some time.
Me: eh...I only really go out on Fridays to Applebee's.  Don and I befriended the bartender there, and he only works Fridays and Saturdays. So Fridays are sort of my designated day to have a social life.
Him: oh, well then I'll go there and buy you a drink.
Me: thank you?

Yikes!

There I was, picturing awkward drinks with my usual Friday "date" and another "date."  So I did what any rational person would(n't) do: decided to invite more people to join Jamie's Awkward Party (also known as Jamie's Inappropriate Men Party).  So far, I found one other guy to come along - a guy friend (married, so he definitely fits in the parameters for the second party name) who works in another department. He doesn't know the other players, and apparently thrives on awkward.  I joked about inviting Scott, but...well, that just seemed like a bad idea on many levels.  I really am planning on inviting some more people from work.  If I build up enough of a crowd, then it'll be much more of a party atmosphere and (hopefully) less awkward.

So...anyone free on Friday around 2:45?  First round of fried green beans are on me (or one of my dates...)!

Happy Birthday, Joshua*

*names changed to protect the innocent child

Scott and I just got back from dinner at TooJays, the closest thing central Florida has to a good Jewish deli. We were seated near 4 old people sitting at a big table. We ordered our drinks, and then the rest of their party showed up: mom, dad, a little boy, and a baby girl.

Fifteen minutes later, the cooing and cheek pinching and baby talk had slowed down enough that we could actually make out grown-up words mixed in. "Happy birthday!" "Do you like your new Star Wars bed?" "Did you think grandma for your new toys?" We got to sit through one of the women (my guess is not the mother) singing the theme song from "Elmo's World" to the baby girl. And then the conversation took a strange turn.

"Your birthday is important to a lot of people." Scott and I were trying to figure out why the Dad was trying to give the kid a Jesus complex. I wanted to turn around and tell the kid that no one outside of that table gave a damn about his birthday, and that some day soon he'd be old enough to know how obnoxious his family was and he'd be embarrassed. But I didn't. And that's a good thing. We had been mocking the conversation when all of a sudden snippets of conversation along the lines of "and a lot of people died..." and "they call it Patriot's Day" came toward us.

Oh. My. God. And so we learned:

a) 4(ish) is the age when you tell your kid about 9-11.
b) if your kid's birthday is on 9-11, you have to celebrate it a full week in advance. (really, the party is tomorrow)
c) TooJay's is the new Chuck-E-Cheese

Scott also got the fringe benefit of watching the family eating. I can't do justice to his description of Mom feeding the baby and herself at the same time, but trust me - I was suddenly glad they were only assaulting one of my senses!

Needless to say, the ambiance just wasn't great tonight. So we got a slice of cake (for my half-birthday) to go. If you'll excuse me, there's a zillion calories in the fridge calling my name.

Happy early birthday, Joshua.

Warning Label

WARNING: This product may cause you to react violently. You should not drive or operate machinery until you know what it will do to you. You should probably avoid people, too. Just to be safe.

Coffee should have a warning label. Not one of those lame McDonalds "this product may be hot" labels, but one like they put on medications. The "you might lose your hair or bleed from your nipples" type of warning label.

After my one cup of coffee at Mimi's yesterday at breakfast (corned beef hash is good for the soul), the waitress offered me a cup to-go. And she brought out a cup slightly smaller than the large Chick-fil-A buckets-o-tea. So I added my 3 sugars and no cream and went on about my day. I nursed that cup of coffee for at least an hour, driving to the chiropractor's office, driving from there to run some other errands, and finally driving to work.

I know my brain was getting buzz-y about the time I called and left a really long voicemail for my mom. I was thinking, "woah...I talk FAST!"

By the time I sat down at work, I was in full-on jitters. It started out as "hahaha... caffeeeeeeeeeeeeine!" but shortly turned into (actual direct quote), "I CAN'T TYPE A CAPITAL F!" Literally. Every time I tried to type "F," my fingers were making "Gf." It took me 4 or 5 tries to get it right.

In school, they teach you that marijuana is a gateway drug. I wouldn't know about that. I can tell you for sure though that for someone who rarely drinks coffee, it's really fun to spend a few hours on an artificial high. I get the appeal. That's why I rarely drink it. And also why I rarely drink alcohol. It's fun to be a lightweight. That's why today I'm sticking with cran-apple juice. It's definitely more my speed!

Racially Charged Nachos

Scott and I got take-out from one of our favorite local Tex-Mex chains tonight. In addition to my tacos and his combo plate, we ordered pork nachos with no lettuce, black olives, or jalapenos. I'm pretty sure someone over there needs to work on their shorthand. Check out the actual un-edited writing on the top of the box:

Sign of the Times

It's a sad time for fine dining. I was doing a little research on AAA Five Diamond restaurants in various markets around the country - Florida, NYC, Vegas and Chicago - and found it's not a great time to be in the business of opulent cuisine. Of the four 2009 Five Diamond restaurants here in Florida:

* Artisans at the Ritz Carlton Naples is closed indefinitely. Currently the room is being used for private functions.
* L'Escalier at The Breakers is only open seasonally, from November through May
* The Restaurant at the Four Seasons Palm Beach is closed for the summer
* Only Victoria & Albert's at WDW is still open year-round, obviously kept afloat by tourist dollars brought in by the lure of Disney/Universal/Sea World.

It looks like Florida isn't alone. Tuscon's only Five Diamond restaurant won't be reopening after its summer hiatus. (from the Arizona Daily Star) The end of the article reads like a eulogy for fine dining:

It once was that when a restaurant garnered the AAA Five Diamond award, it was a near guarantee of customers. The award, given rarely, is a mark of sublime cuisine, service and ambiance.

But the closure of the Ventana Room follows a trend of five-diamond restaurants closing around the country.

In Phoenix, the tony Mary Elaine's at the Phoenician Resort closed and reopened as a steakhouse, albeit one with a James Beard Award-winning chef, Jean-Georges Vongerichten, at the helm. In Scottsdale, the Fairmont Scottsdale Princess Resort's five-diamond restaurant, Marquesa, closed two years ago. In Boston, Aujourd'hui, the fine-dining restaurant at the Four Seasons, closed late last spring.

I wonder how many will be left by November when AAA releases the 2010 winners. I wonder whether the era of conspicuous excess is coming to an end for good. And I wonder if the rich have finally stopped getting richer while the poor get poorer.

Lurker

Lovely image, aren't I?

During our adventure yesterday, Scott and I stopped at the TooJays on 50 in Ocoee (I think it's in Ocoee...) and had lunch - the reuben for him and the shrimp salad wrap for me. Next time, I think I'll go back to my old standard brisket sandwich with extra horseradish. And then we ordered dessert.

That slice of cake up there is two layers of chocolate cake with a layer of cheesecake in between. Have you ever heard of such a thing? Well it's absolutely delicious. The slice is, as you can tell by comparing it to the size of my giant mouth, gargantuan. Between the two of us, I think we finished just over half of it. And it was sooo good!

Anyway, I would have probably made this my Facebook profile picture and never put it here on the blog, but I LOVE that goober looking over my shoulder! As soon as Scott showed me the picture, that was the first thing I saw - "is there someone standing behind me?" And Scott said that the guy tried to jump in and smile.

Mostly, it makes me happy to know that there are people in the world besides me and my mom who do stuff like that. And I love that I was the victim of a lurker!

Something Wicked (Tasty) This Way Comes

Coming soon to an apartment complex near someone you know:

Cohen's Deli & Butcher Shop
(which so far doesn't have much of a web presence)

Bagels "hot from the oven!" Matzo ball soup! Sandwiches! Salads! Desserts!

I know it's probably too much to expect that the food will be as good as I remember from my childhood, or even as good as TooJay's, but I have my fingers crossed. And you can bet I'll be there on or slightly after September 1 to try out the new place!

It's Funny Because it's Hitler

...but Sad Because it's True!

Living Legend

For anyone out there who doesn't know who Paul Bocuse is, he's basically the original celebrity chef. He's the first chef-owner to name a restaurant for himself and step out of the kitchen and into the spotlight.

The Bocuse d'Or, an international cooking competition dubbed the "Culinary Olympics," is named for him.

He is a living legend.

Last month, my friend Gayle went to France with a friend who had won this really cool river cruise vacation, and one of their stops was Bocuse's restaurant in Lyon. She had e-mailed me before she went and asked if I had ever heard of the restaurant, and I basically sent her back 500 words with no punctuation breathlessly explaining who Bocuse is, and how freaking lucky she was. ("oh yeah, and I hate you.")

Upon her return, she sent me another e-mail about her lunch, and how her friend had told everyone about how Gayle used to work at The Restaurant. She struck up a broken-English conversation with one of the waiters, who had worked for a time at Chefs de France at Epcot (which is run by Jerome Bocuse - his son), and was familiar with The Restaurant as well as The Chef. My name came up somewhere in there, as in "my friend Jamie works there..." And when the waiter asked if she'd like a signed menu to take back to her friend, she jumped on it.

Gayle says she guesses the waiter didn't understand as much of the conversation as she had thought, and she debated whether to send the menu to me at all. I'll call it a happy accident, that my husband and The Chef should share the same first name, and therefore HE got a really cool gift from France. It's actually better, because Scott loves cooking so much more than I do. I think he almost misted up a bit when he pulled the menu out of the envelope.

Plus, the menu is cool enough looking (all those circles are the same shiny gold as the edge) that I'd actually consider framing it and hanging it in our kitchen...when we have a kitchen with actual wall space! Our autograph from a living legend definitely deserves to be seen!

I'm In!

I've been peer-pressured into doing the May NaBloPoMo (theme: "sweet"), so Happy May! Here I am!

Scott and I did another hour of biking at Ft. Wilderness this morning, followed by lunch at Sweet Tomatoes (now open at Crossroads!). Now, we're on our way to what is becoming a weekly cook-out at Dave's.

We have a few pictures from today's outing, but they are, for now, still on the camera. I'll try to post a few when we get home. (or after midnight for tomorrow's post)

As for the theme, I'm not sure if they were talking about sweet treats or sweet things like kitten photos. Today, I'll tell you about the desserts we had at dinner last night at The Ravenous Pig. We split a strawberry-rhubarb crisp and a caramel-chocolate tart. Both were divine... and WAY sweet! The best part of the meal though was the veggies that came with my fish. That's the first time I've ever had okra served as a vegetable instead of deep-fried. I'm totally in love!

TTFN... I'm off to a decidedly less high-brow dinner tonight!!