What Could Possibly Be Unsafe?

We went to Gatorland today with Beth and Pete and their girls. I had never been, and was really excited about seeing another facet of the Central Florida tourism economy. Gatorland is pretty neat - the have gator wrestling, gator jumping, gator breeding, baby gators, gator feeding, gator eating (gator nuggets and ribs are on the menu) and some non-gator activities as well.

Beth bought everyone's tickets, and bought the "deluxe" ticket, which included admission, unlimited train rides, gator feeding, and your very own opportunity to "wrestle" a gator. So here's what we learned about junior gator wrestling: it's fool-proof. They tape the mouth shut, you straddle it, you hold the head up and smile for the picture, and you climb off.

I watched the girls do it, I watched Pete do it, and then it was my turn. Well I got down on my knees, grabbed the mouth, smiled for the picture, and then the gator got loose! He shook his head and the next thing I knew, I was riding the alligator towards the concrete moat! The trainer guy declined to help me, and got up and walked out of my sight line. But he was talking on the mic the whole time so I knew he was still there. And I thought it was funny, thinking "I can't even wrestle a taped-up gator!"

It wasn't until about an hour ago when I looked at the pictures Scott had taken that I saw the trainer guy behind me, with his foot suspiciously in the air as if he had been prodding the gator making it move! Scott claims to have seen nothing, because he was too busy taking pictures.

What you see below are my other family members performing their jobs properly, and me screwing it all up (the pics of me are in reverse order), and a picture of Scott with his friend the bird.

Well, that's the most exciting part of the Gatorland trip. We did have fun doing other stuff, but dinner is ready. Speaking of dinner, you know what they give you to feed the alligators? Cold hot dogs! I guess Scott got a hot dog craving, because that's what we're having!